Sponsors who pay touring professionals $200,000 to more than $1,000,000 a year are annoyed and angry. Ted Wolfe, Executive Director for the trade group Show My Logo, tells Golf Lampoon that “our members are angry that pro golfers are hiding hat logos beneath their sunglasses. We don’t think it’s intentional … but we do believe that a little re-education is in order.”
To that end, Show My Logo is requiring all pro golfers with hat deals to spend 5 days at its No-Logo Boot Camp in Tunisia. There they’ll be instructed in knowing the location of TV cameras at all times during a golf tournament … as well as the proper way to perch sunglasses on a hat. Says Wolfe: “It’s simple. Put ’em on the BACK of the hat, dummy!”
No-Logo Boot Camp attendees fly into the capital city of Tunis. Then it’s a 2-day camel ride to the No-Logo Boot Camp in the Sahara Desert. “We have an ex-drill sergeant from the Moroccan Royal Guards — Khamir El Ray-Ban — who will put the fear of you-know-who in these pros,” says Wolfe. “It’s no picnic there. Once they realize there are no coolers with free Gatorade within 1500 miles, they’ll pay attention … and NEVER hide a hat logo again!”
