Tiger’s recent arrest for DUI and crashing his car in Jupiter Island shocked the nation. Several days later, he supposedly traveled to Switzerland to seek treatment for a medical condition. That will keep Tiger out of the limelight for an unknown period of time. What won’t change is the golf media’s addiction to any Tiger Woods news. Golf Lampoon also relies on sensational, fictional, and misleading clickbait stories to attract readers and advertising dollars.
So we have compiled a list of faux Tiger Woods articles that we are storing “in the bank,” ready to be published when Tiger returns to his “normal” life. We wish him well.
- Tiger’s Secrets For Using Double Coupons At Publix
- Top-10 Ways Tiger Disrespected Mother Teresa
- Tiger Rips Augusta National: “The Azaleas On 13 Have Lace Bugs!”
- Tiger’s Freebie Bombshell: “The Toll Guy At The Florida Turnpike Jupiter Exit Always Waves Me Through”
- Lindsey Vonn Dishes on Tiger: “He has sex while listening to Lawrence Welk”
- Exclusive: Tiger’s Top-10 Ways to Not Answer a Question
- Tiger Woods Declares: “My Club Twirling Is Not An Affectation!”
- “Why Flying Commercial Is For Losers” by Tiger Woods
- Tiger Woods and FDR at Yalta: A Retrospective
- Tiger’s Blackjack Strategy: Play Every Spot for the Table Limit and Tip the Cocktail Waitress Once
- Tiger’s Ex-Wife Confesses: “It Wasn’t a 9-Iron; I Brained Him With A Smooth Pitching Wedge”
- Phil Mickelson Reveals: “Tiger Books My Football Bets and Charges Me 10 Points Vig”
- Tiger At Sea: “Copy My #1 Spearfishing Secret!”
- Why Tiger Doesn’t Stock Q-Tips Brand On His Yacht (“Generics Are Just As Good!”)
- Tiger Erupts at NYC’s Katz’s Deli: “Whatta Ya Mean You’re Out of Dr. Brown’s Cream Soda?”
- Orthopedic Surgeon’s Nurse Says: “I Touched Tiger’s Manhood While He Was Under Anesthesia”
- “My 30-Year Secret Love Affair With Tiger Woods” by Barbra Streisand
- Tiger’s New Book: “You Want Golf Tips? I Got Ya Tips Right Here!”
- Nike Club Fitter Bombshell: Tiger Uses Triple Wraps Under His Grips
- Tiger To Join LIV Golf? “If They Pick Up My Yacht’s Diesel Bill, Buh-Bye PGA Tour”
- Blue Cross/Blue Shield of Florida Prez: “Tiger’s Claims Are Killing Our Bottom Line”
- Ex-Isleworth Neighbor Mark O’Meara Blasts Tiger: ”He Never Returned My Power Drill”
- Tiger Talks Taxes: “Write It Off, Write It Off, Write It Off!”
- Book Excerpt: “The Tiger Woods I Never Knew” by Bobby Jones
- Top Tiger Tip: “Never Get Stuck In Your Backswing … OR With A Check!”
